Dungeons and Dragons, but your character must be a self insert, and class is determined by your current abilities
Barbarian Must have a demonstrable temper, go off I guess Bard Must be able to play an instrument Cleric Must be involved in a religious organization Druid Must have demonstrable knowledge of, or passion for nature Fighter Must beat the DM in physical combat (hope your DM’s a wimp) Monk Must practice a martial art Paladin Must have a cause that one actively supports Ranger Must be able to fire a kind of ranged weapon accurately Rogue Must sneak up on the DM (Hard mode: steal their dice) Sorcerer Must have a powerful family heirloom Warlock Must work for a powerful entity (Corporations, The Government) Wizard Must have a College Degree or a 3.0 GPA
If you can’t be any of these you start as a commoner, and may become one of these classes when you finally satisfy these conditions.
i need a new desk chair but where am i going to find an armchair that’s under three feet wide, has a tall enough back that i can rest my head on it, has comfy arms, and a wide enough seat that i can sit w/ my legs up on it without them slipping off
I’ve been using a Critical Role-based system of time management for so long that whenever they go on hiatus I completely lose track of the day of the week. Is it Thursday yet? I don’t know. I couldn’t tell you the date or even what year we’re in. It’s been a decade since I heard Matthew Mercer’s voice and I’ve resorted to eating my dice out of desperation.
I’m having so much trouble posting anything about last night’s episode because there were like five different mini-plots going on, each involving different characters, all of them drastically different in tone and mood!
But one thing I absolutely know I want to talk about is Beau and Fjord.
Beau has spent the entire campaign looking to Fjord as a mentor. He offered early on to coach her in being friendlier and more courteous, in toning down her hair-trigger aggression and sarcasm, and she readily accepted. He’s kept that promise so many times, talking her through apologies and hugs and kind gestures, and she has taken the techniques he taught her and practiced them on her own, visibly changing and growing as a result. From expressing affection and loyalty (“I would have laid down my life for you guys”) to exercising patience in a stressful situation (“I…wait”), Beau is, in so many ways, the person Fjord has helped her become.
And I think that one of the most simultaneously heartwarming and disconcerting things about this past episode is that we saw her surpass him.
Beau is at a peak of character development right now. She’s just asked Fjord to make her First Mate, and is working hard at it and taking her responsibilities very seriously–not only the practical everyday running of the ship, but her responsibility for the morale of the crew. She bought them mead and asked Caduceus to help her throw a dinner party for them, for heaven’s sake. She also noticed the M9′s emotional distress after the dragon fight, brought it up with Fjord, and stayed up drinking tea with Caduceus and planning how to comfort them. She’s even stood up for Nott more than once in recent episodes (to Caleb when he classified her as one of the “assholes,” and to Fjord on one of the multiple occasions when he mocked and made light of her phobia). And then there was Beau’s talk with Jester.
That talk was show-stopping in so many ways. Beau demonstrated so much insight into everything that’s going on with Jester (her abandonment issues, her insecurities about whether people really like her, her constant repression of any sign of sadness or anger), and she did everything right in response: apologized repeatedly for accidentally leaving Jester behind, opened up to Jester about her own similar issues, praised Jester for how well she’s handled them, told her it’s ok to be openly sad or angry, told her she actually “looks forward” to seeing Jester’s anger and will admire her no less for it, told her she’ll always have Beau for a friend, and told her she loves her.
Beau is everything the Mighty Nein needs right now. She’s quickly growing knowledgeable about running the ship. She’s open and loving and concerned for everyone’s welfare (even the poor crew of NPCs that everyone else except Caduceus has been neglecting so badly). She alone in the entire party has been both vocally and demonstrably committed to moral and behavioral self-improvement, which is the one thing every one of them (…except maybe Cad) desperately needs.
And Fjord? Her close friend and mentor, who did so much to get her to this point, placed a great deal of trust in her, and showed his pride in her more than once? Fjord is currently trivializing the feelings of everyone around him (Nott being the most obvious, but I’m definitely including Jester in this too–halfheartedly offering to make her a plate of food after she was nearly killed by a dragon due to one of his foolish whims doesn’t cut it). He’s ignoring the crew (and sometimes even his own teammates!) except when he’s barking orders at them–and ill-considered and dangerous orders, at that. He’s so single-mindedly focused on his desire for a relatively trivial bit of power that he’s barely bothering with courtesies anymore, and when they do come out of his mouth, they don’t sound terribly convincing. And all of this would be startling and upsetting enough, considering the kind, courteous, democratically-minded Fjord that most of us have come to know and love…but seeing the contrast the last couple episodes between him and his protégé, the supposed asshole of the group, makes it all the more obvious (a.) how amazingly far Beau has come and what a goddamn leadership icon she’s become, and (b.) just how badly Fjord is slipping.
when mitski said i am a forest fire and i am the fire and i am the forest and i am a witness watching it i stand in a valley watching it and you are not there at all
